As the only NYU undergraduate student enrolled in the course (and the only non-music education student), I realized afterwards how different the approach of my participation must've been compared to the other NYU grad students.
I had approached my participation in IMPACT as just another undergraduate student, similar to most of the international students who participated. Over the course of IMPACT however, I realized my contact with the creative process proved to be much different compared to most of the students. For example, I realized I was always one of the firsts to volunteer in a group environment. I noticed how most of the international students were very shy and did not want to participate when required to be put in a spotlight.
I believe in a certain way I empathize with their feelings of shyness. I had gone to local school in Taipei, Taiwan until the 6th grade and my transition to international school starting with middle school proved an eye opener that required a huge adjustment: from my language usage to my attitude.
I believe a few things contributed to the international students' shyness, something that I was very familiar with when I first transferred into international school. In a drastically different culture, it is easy to assume that the environment can be hostile; I believe the IMPACT staff made an excellent job to ensure that the environment is a safe and open one. Their shyness is also an attribute of their culture, I believe. It was frowned upon to try to stand out in a crowd when I was in local school; all the students were generally taught to conform in the tiniest details--the way one stands in line, the way one speaks, to the way one sits at one's desk. If a student liked something different than the mainstream's likings, then the individual was considered weird and outcasted. There was very little empathy in accepting or considering someone else's views.
In retrospect, I believe I could've adjusted my perspective and given the international students more opportunities to participate and share. I think that since I'm already relatively familiar and comfortable with sharing, I should've given more chances to the students rather than always volunteering first and stealing other people's opportunities to share.
IMPACT also taught me what it's like to be assigned to a group and work with the group consistently for a whole month. My group dynamic wasn't the greatest; there was in fact a lot of bickering in between our members and I regret to say that there were moments where I could've been kinder. I think I got lost in my competitive nature--I wanted to present the best material we could and I allowed too many instances of conflict unresolved. I became very frustrated and so have the rest of my group members; some chose to opt-out and not participate entirely. Some became annoyed with my requests. We lost group spirit at the end. Some didn't have the same vision shared with me and some of the group members, and I believe some came to saw me as tyrannical and harbored negative feelings towards me. This outcome taught me some very valuable lessons. It taught me to be more self-aware, especially in competitive situations. It taught me to reconsider what is most important under any circumstance; often times I enjoy in the thrill of competition, but I also can be very short-tempered. I think my desire in competition and in being the best comparatively is a sort of conceited attitude that I should examine further. Recently I had realized it seeps into every nook and cranny of my life. Though some consider being competitive as I good thing, I believe the motivations behind a competitive personality like mine should be examined more.
On the other hand, IMPACT has been such an invaluable experience for me because of how amazingly well-resourced, organized, welcoming IMPACT was. It is a very fortunate opportunity for anyone indeed, as the program is filled with skill learning experiences. As a participant, I had access to so many incredibly talented staff and faculty who welcomed my curiosity. When I was in IMPACT, I felt like I could explore and learn everything I was curious about at the tip of my fingers. It was an amazing learning experience. Contrary to some of my experiences in undergrad, all of the teachers and lecturers were very easy to talk to and very happy to teach their craft.
As a bonus to participating in IMPACT, we were gifted the books Consilience, Cassandra, and The Rhythmic Event. I'm still working my way through the texts, however they're such delightful gifts; the fact that they were designed to supplement my experience with IMPACT and life was so, so great. I can't wait until I finish the texts and reflect on their relevance to IMPACT.
Tuesday, September 6, 2016
Sunday, August 14, 2016
Kenya
Tonight, I will embark on a two-week journey in Kenya. I will bring with me the perspectives and frameworks learned from Impact. Though internet connection will be scarce, I will be writing in my notebook and transposing my thoughts into my blog once I return. Ciao!
Thursday, August 4, 2016
IlPom
IlPom's performance thoroughly engrossed me. Following my last post, I suppose from another angle everyone has their escape? And media provides an incredibly easy and quick access to whatever escape we want. We are spoiled, I suppose. What does being spoiled imply?
He showed us his process of making a music piece using Ableton Live, or as he calls "a well rounded cake," and his cakes just mesmerize me as does Georgetown cupcake does to many. Instrumental arrangement always fascinates me, as a well rounded arrangement creates a magical experience that transcends many experiences.
I notice that certain acoustical textures really feeds my mind; I especially love sounds that have an immense spatial quality to it. DAW softwares these days make creating reverb and delay so much easier than the past with plates and other experiments. Certain DAW's even have built-in calculations that help the user create the sound they want: how many people in the room, the exact dimensions of the room, etc.
Dr. Thomas MacFarlane has stated his observation of our attraction towards ambience sounds or sounds that create space in the imagination. I wonder if this tendency has something to do with our industrialized lives and our lack of interaction with nature. After all, mother nature never ceases to fascinate me.
Sweets don't create a sensation in my brain anymore, music does. I wonder if this will stay with me throughout my life or like any other drug, become less and less rewarding with time.
He showed us his process of making a music piece using Ableton Live, or as he calls "a well rounded cake," and his cakes just mesmerize me as does Georgetown cupcake does to many. Instrumental arrangement always fascinates me, as a well rounded arrangement creates a magical experience that transcends many experiences.
I notice that certain acoustical textures really feeds my mind; I especially love sounds that have an immense spatial quality to it. DAW softwares these days make creating reverb and delay so much easier than the past with plates and other experiments. Certain DAW's even have built-in calculations that help the user create the sound they want: how many people in the room, the exact dimensions of the room, etc.
Dr. Thomas MacFarlane has stated his observation of our attraction towards ambience sounds or sounds that create space in the imagination. I wonder if this tendency has something to do with our industrialized lives and our lack of interaction with nature. After all, mother nature never ceases to fascinate me.
Sweets don't create a sensation in my brain anymore, music does. I wonder if this will stay with me throughout my life or like any other drug, become less and less rewarding with time.
Pokemon Going
Amidst the craze over the android and iOs app Pokemon Go, I witnessed for the first time the shock and craze that disappoints and confuses me. As I walked up the stairs to 60th St and 5th Ave, I saw a thick crowd of people taking over the sidewalks of central park, with more swaths of people walking towards the direction with their hands down and back slouched. The image of their slouch is nothing short of this depiction:
And it haunts me yet again. What message does the medium portray? Are people just too bored nowadays to allow an engrossment with a game like this? And why does this happen? Are people just too unhappy and unsatisfied with their lives to devote hours of their week in this game? What do they really get out of it?
I feel lucky that I am not one of those people. I thought that I should try it out to understand the drive behind the craze but after playing a few games nothing about it addicts me at all. I always found it humorous when I see people on the street looking at their phone and not at their surroundings. What of our surroundings are short of amusement? I like to observe the way the light is reflected on different surfaces, why they do, and what imagery it creates. I like to ponder about things but I also like to be present. I find that staying present often allows the mind to glean into insights that your mind would otherwise be too fatigued to understand.
This craze, to me, is just another phenomenon which shows human kind's lack of introspection and reckless engrossment with amusement. This phenomenon is purely crazy to me, but then I suppose human kind is never short of craze.
Tuesday, August 2, 2016
"Digital Witness"
Today, I watched a video on Australian Design firm Buro North's creation: a spin-off of ground level traffic lights. The video spiraled into popularity this morning as a novelty; however, pedestrian-level traffic lights has been adopted by Augsburg, Germany, as early as April 25th, 2016. The city had caved in to the evolved habits of their citizens, and decided to accommodate this habit. Many find this act hilarious and pathetic; they frown upon our tendency to depend more and more on digital reality rather than staying present with the 'real world." I am one of those people. I fear of future generations' dependency on VSLR and digital reality. It scares me that soon people may program and design digital avatars to interact with however they like and potentially never need to learn to empathize and interact with real people. This leads to many implications. What of the people who never step out of their comfort zone and meet another human being, a potential life partner? Will this mean a continued and significant decrease in generating population? Will this necessitate an increase in digital dependency in all facets of our lifestyles?
And as I ponder upon my participation in IMPACT, I wonder if i'm encouraging this type of behavior via the items I've made: i.e. interactive instruments through the makey-makey and Kate Stone's interactive physical-digital touch technology. I'd like to think that these instruments could help me create an experience that can ultimately enhance an audience's engagement with the present and offer an opportunity for introspection. At the same time, however, I am depending on these multimedia technologies to create this experience. I wonder if it's necessary to depend on technology to create the effect I want--that is, a certain type of introspection and engagement with the present. In fact, is one type of performance more prestigious than the other? Surely, as of the present many would agree that the more technologically advanced an entertainment production is the more spectacular the show. But at what point does a spectacle become a corrupting mechanism that inhibits introspection and only creates distraction? Does that really matter?
This stream of thought reminded me of Marshall McLuhan and IMPACTer's discussion of various philosophers at our last meeting; you can read a great summary on McLuhan by Dr. John Gilbert here. I would love to read in detail his works to fully understand his message. The medium is the message, McLuhan said. What does the medium really tell us and can we be alert enough to avoid the negative consequences?
Sunday, July 31, 2016
Ownership
Creating things somehow entangles the narcissistic desire of ownership for me, I noticed.
After settling on a vision yesterday at the hackathon, I set out immediately to accomplish it. And after spending 4 hours of creating this object on my own and with a help of another partner, I immediately had the thirst to pride it as our creation: but I noticed what emanated most strongly was my pride to call the idea and design creation my own. I became reluctant to let other people who wanted to join in later in on the project; I wanted to accomplish all aspects of the project, and the desire to dominate grew. A teammate wanted to do the soldering, but I told him I wanted to do it and he let me. When other people wanted to join in on the project and alter my vision, I became strongly antagonistic and dominating. I felt that I had done so much work and invested so much of my time in it with only the help of another teammate, thus it wasn't right that someone else wants to alter the vision and claim the object as her own, too. I was very, very reluctant to share--and I had made sure the first thing she knew was that this project was designed for our group performance and made sure that she was okay with us claiming it. I didn't even ask for her name or try to get to know her first. My territorial instincts kicked in hard. It was a very odd feeling that just dominated, something strong that I could feel physically inside my body.
Thinking back, I know it serves me little to be this selfish. During the hackathon, I had no desire to really work with other people unless they contributed in helping me achieve my vision. I realized it's a pretty limiting perspective and it's a perspective that sets out to cut the possibilities short. Perhaps I need to develop a coping mechanism and be more present with myself in order to realize when it's happening and go beyond what I'm feeling at present. It was very hard for me to see the other side of the perspective when I felt that way and had all that feeling simmering inside me.
After settling on a vision yesterday at the hackathon, I set out immediately to accomplish it. And after spending 4 hours of creating this object on my own and with a help of another partner, I immediately had the thirst to pride it as our creation: but I noticed what emanated most strongly was my pride to call the idea and design creation my own. I became reluctant to let other people who wanted to join in later in on the project; I wanted to accomplish all aspects of the project, and the desire to dominate grew. A teammate wanted to do the soldering, but I told him I wanted to do it and he let me. When other people wanted to join in on the project and alter my vision, I became strongly antagonistic and dominating. I felt that I had done so much work and invested so much of my time in it with only the help of another teammate, thus it wasn't right that someone else wants to alter the vision and claim the object as her own, too. I was very, very reluctant to share--and I had made sure the first thing she knew was that this project was designed for our group performance and made sure that she was okay with us claiming it. I didn't even ask for her name or try to get to know her first. My territorial instincts kicked in hard. It was a very odd feeling that just dominated, something strong that I could feel physically inside my body.
Thinking back, I know it serves me little to be this selfish. During the hackathon, I had no desire to really work with other people unless they contributed in helping me achieve my vision. I realized it's a pretty limiting perspective and it's a perspective that sets out to cut the possibilities short. Perhaps I need to develop a coping mechanism and be more present with myself in order to realize when it's happening and go beyond what I'm feeling at present. It was very hard for me to see the other side of the perspective when I felt that way and had all that feeling simmering inside me.
Friday, July 29, 2016
Levels
I'm very very thankful I had the opportunity today to perform at the Impact 2016 Showcase!!! It was a very interesting experience for me; though I felt nauseous before and after my performance, I learned so much from this experience!!
One thing that caught my attention from a video recording I received post-performance was the difference between my perception and the audience's perception of the performance. My imagination of how I must've been portrayed to the audience was short of true, because I was not aware of the special effects the tech crew had thoughtfully put on during my performance (which I'm super, super thankful of!!)
The video effects actually helped me a great deal in building the drama and arch of the song. As you can see, there is a gradual increase in the level of drama; from the gradual close-up of the frame to the inclusion of the left and right camera images on one screen, forming a twice-duplicated moving-image and a triangular showcase of a single performer. The leveling of the video effects set the stage with much more context and helped attract much more attention, I believe.
During the performance, I had thought that I was baring the stage with no video effects at all; after watching the video however, my perception of my performance changed 180 degrees. Really, really huge thanks to the tech crew and for the entire IMPACT staff to create such a magical and impactful experience for me. Really---I cannot express how grateful I am of the entire experience I've had so far. The faculty and staff have been so wonderful and kind and eager to help me grow as an individual and artist; I constantly feel loved and cared for, as I know that the faculty and staff invests so much in me as an IMPACT participant. I really can't say enough of how great my experience is been!!!!!
One thing that caught my attention from a video recording I received post-performance was the difference between my perception and the audience's perception of the performance. My imagination of how I must've been portrayed to the audience was short of true, because I was not aware of the special effects the tech crew had thoughtfully put on during my performance (which I'm super, super thankful of!!)
The video effects actually helped me a great deal in building the drama and arch of the song. As you can see, there is a gradual increase in the level of drama; from the gradual close-up of the frame to the inclusion of the left and right camera images on one screen, forming a twice-duplicated moving-image and a triangular showcase of a single performer. The leveling of the video effects set the stage with much more context and helped attract much more attention, I believe.
During the performance, I had thought that I was baring the stage with no video effects at all; after watching the video however, my perception of my performance changed 180 degrees. Really, really huge thanks to the tech crew and for the entire IMPACT staff to create such a magical and impactful experience for me. Really---I cannot express how grateful I am of the entire experience I've had so far. The faculty and staff have been so wonderful and kind and eager to help me grow as an individual and artist; I constantly feel loved and cared for, as I know that the faculty and staff invests so much in me as an IMPACT participant. I really can't say enough of how great my experience is been!!!!!
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